Why My P8TT Family Is So Important To Me

March 4, 2011 at 10:00 am 41 comments

This post is part of P8TT’s semi-annual fundraising drive. Please help us so we can keep this community together to fight the battles ahead. You can chip in here to make a one-time donation, or here to make a monthly donation, which helps P8TT have a more steady source of funding.

By Richard Walter-Jernigan

Hello! It’s Richard here. Most of you here know me since I am one of the earliest sign-ons to the P8TT family. And yes, to me it is a family. Within our online family, I feel so secure in being myself, and I have learned so much here. Kathleen, Ann S. Carpool Cookie, Trish, and our other legal eagles have shared from their own knowledge of the law and also shared so many links to other law resources that I feel I have almost finished law school under their tutelage, and I am so grateful for that. Michelle and Marlene have expanded my knowledge of transgender issues so that I am even better prepared to help fight to make sure my trans brothers and sisters are not thrown under the bus at every turn. Ronnie has helped turn me into a Gleek and a Gaga fan! Sheryl, Mormon Mother of a Wonderful Son Who Just Happens to be Gay, Santa Barbara Mom, and others have taught me so much about the LDS church and its inner workings. Fiona, LLB, AnonyGrl, Kathleen, Sheryl Carver, Kate, and the other ladies, whether they are gay, bi, trans, or straight, have all helped me grow in my understanding of women’s issues. Franck, Felyx&Kevyn, and our other couples have taught me why UAFA is so important, and from what I have learned in this family, all of you have contributed to re-awakening my activist side.

In addition, all of you have witnessed the evolution of my relationship with BZ, as demonstrated through the changes in my handle here since I first joined. I started out as Richard A. Walter, then as we began to work on the logistics and finances of going to a marriage equality state, you saw my handle change to Richard A. Walter (soon to be Walter-Jernigan) and since BZ’s birthday in November, you have now seen my handle as Richard A. Jernigan. Right now, that is only my legal name in those states which will recognize our Connecticut wedding, but I am not changing back, because we are in a state of flux with the tide rolling ever more insistently toward marriage equality. DK even showed up in Westbrook at our wedding and reported back to the rest of the P8TT family and I later provided a YouTube link so that those who could not attend could watch the videos.

And on the P8TT board itself, we have grown to be so much more than just the Prop 8 trial. We have covered DOMA, ENDA, DADT, UAFA, and other events that at first may not appear to be related, but actually are related. And as a family, we have dealt with trolls, spam artists and those who may be making an honest effort to learn more about the Rainbow Tribe in their own efforts to end discrimination. We have grown as a community and as a family. We have shared about births, deaths, engagements, marriages, and all of the other ups and downs of life. And we even call each other out when any of us get out of line. And we cheerfully welcome our lurkers with a virtual table of cookies, challah, MILK, and whatever other goodies we can put on that table.

All of this and more is why this family is so important to me, and why I think it is important to all of us. This is our online home. We know we are safe here. We know that each of us has everybody else’s back. We know that there will be occasional misunderstandings and squabbles. Hey, that’s what happens in families, both online and offline. But we have all moved forward, and we have been there together.We have learned exactly what we can accomplish as a family when we get out there and vote. We have learned what happens when we send emails, snail mails, and make telephone calls. WE have learned what kind of power we can wield. Let’s keep this going.

I know that very few of us like pitches for money. But this one is important. Each of us is able to contribute in different ways at different times, and right now, those of us who have the means are needed for some financial contributions. Some of us can send money now, some cannot. Most of us have contributed before now and will do so again in the future as finances permit. For those who can contribute now, please feel free to help keep the lights on here at P8TT. And if you have already (or can’t), ask someone you know. Thanks.

P.S.: Whether you are able to send money now or in the future, I want everyone here in the P8TT family to know that in one way or another you are all on my list of heroes and sheroes.

Entry filed under: Community/Meta, P8TT fundraising.

P8TT=Love, Information, Acceptance “Adam Bink and his big, beautiful mouth”

41 Comments Add your own

  • 1. bJason  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:02 am

    Yay, Richard!

  • 3. Lesbians Love Boies  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:05 am

    Beautifully written Richard. Hugs and kisses to you and BZ

  • 5. Kathleen  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:07 am

    Kisses and hugs to Richard and BZ. Beautiful post.

  • 7. Gregory in Salt Lake City  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:12 am

    Shalom Richard! ((HUGS and LOVE)) from Salt Lake City!

    • 8. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:52 am

      Thanks, Gregory! Love and hugs from Hope Mills, NC to Salt Lake City, UT

  • 9. AnonyGrl  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:13 am

    That was gorgeous, Richard! Thank you!!!

  • 11. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:26 am

    Checking in. Thanks everybody for being such an important, integral, necessary part of my life!

  • 12. chris from co  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:38 am

    I took care of my donation. Thank you all for this community. Great results in New Hampshire. 15-0 sweet.

    • 13. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:51 am

      And thank you for being a part of this family, chris!

    • 14. adambink  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:05 am

      Thanks a lot, Chris.

  • 15. Mark M (Seattle)  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:42 am

    Typing through tears…..thank you Richard :-)
    Big Furry Bear Hugs!!

  • 17. Michelle Evans  |  March 4, 2011 at 10:55 am

    Richard, Been wonderful to be here and meet you and all the rest of the great people. Hope that the financial goals can be met and we continue to thrive.

    One day we need to all plan on a giant family reunion somewhere. We truly all are family here.

    • 18. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:04 am

      I would love that! I want to meet everyone here face to face. I have been fortunate enough to meet some of you, but I truly want to be able to meet everyone. That is one of my dreams. And can you imagine the fun we will have!

  • 19. Bob  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:00 am

    loved reading your story Richard,,,, great contribution for all those coming to this site to honestly learn more about ‘THE RAINBOW TRIBE’ Give BZ a hug,,,

  • 21. Ronnie  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:22 am

    Gleeks rule ALL!!!!!!!!……<3….Ronnie

    • 22. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:23 am

      Except where the Little Monsters rule, right, Ronnie?

      • 23. Ronnie  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:29 am

        True, True…but there are some paths crossing….I guess I am a Little Gleeckster…(trademark…I called it…MINE!!!!)… <3…Ronnie

  • 27. bJason  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:42 am

    Maryland House Judiciary Advances Marriage Equality Bill 12-10

    • 28. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:44 am


    • 29. Mark M (Seattle)  |  March 4, 2011 at 12:05 pm

      WOOT WOOT!!!!!

    • 30. AnonyGrl  |  March 4, 2011 at 12:12 pm

      And it looks like it will be voted on sometime next week by the entire House. And the Governor is set to sign it.

      I love it when we get a WOOO HOOO!

  • 31. JPM  |  March 4, 2011 at 11:50 am

    Daily Kos article of P8TT

    rec it if you can

    • 32. Kathleen  |  March 4, 2011 at 12:46 pm

      Wonderful to get the word out at Daily Kos.

  • 34. Mark M (Seattle)  |  March 4, 2011 at 12:04 pm

    Thanks for posting that JPM!

  • 35. Kathleen  |  March 4, 2011 at 12:57 pm

    Speaker Boehner Moves to Begin DOMA Defense

    • 36. fiona64  |  March 4, 2011 at 1:23 pm

      If Boehner’s so fricking worried about jobs and the economy, how come he and his cronies are focused on everything *but* (like dismantling health care reform, and abortion, ,and a whole host of other shit that they bring up that has nothing to do with jobs)?

      In case anyone is wondering about the historical precedent for what is coming in this country, please google “French Revolution.”



      • 37. Richard A. Jernigan  |  March 4, 2011 at 1:39 pm

        And every day that passes, I am ever more grateful that you reminded me about Margaret Atwood’s prescient book, The Handmaid’s Tale. It is so spot on that it is very scary.

    • 38. bJason  |  March 4, 2011 at 1:27 pm

      Thanks for this. I wonder if Boehner realizes what a hole he is digging himself and his party into but is doing it anyway. Is it sick of me to think this will be kind of fun to watch?

      I hate the thought that this could put off the current schedules of any/all of these cases. The House lawyers could ask for continuances (as they are new to the cases), right?

  • 39. Rhie  |  March 4, 2011 at 1:24 pm


  • 40. James Tuttle  |  March 4, 2011 at 1:25 pm

    What a great day of posts. I’ve really enjoyed hearing some of your stories and why this site is so important. This is one of my top 3 most visited sights and is an important part of my daily reading routine. I appreciate all of you guys and think its been, and will continue to be a great adventure. Now that I’ve said that can the 9th Circuit please lift the stay already!!

  • 41. Sagesse  |  March 4, 2011 at 1:54 pm

    For us P8TT veterans, these stories are not new, but it is still calming and affirming to read them.

    Scribin’ from work. TGIF.


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